The SCI‐FI‐I‐SPY Catalogue of All Known Types of Alien

Identification: inhabitants of bizarre environments, usually high‐gravity

Variants: low or high temperature or pressure, extreme pH, or too much pepper

Also Known As: Maksimulites, Chiliax, or Humans (because obviously that's what they call themselves)

Origin: the very edge

LOOKS: half the time they turn out to look like woodlice D
BRAINS: they have neutrons for neurons, which turns out to be an advantage 140
LETHALITY: they can stand back and watch you disintegrate, but that doesn't really count 0.11
CULTURE: an advanced civilisation based on super‐dense exposition 84
HARDNESS: the equivalent of diamond on the SF Mohs scale, pretty much endemic to written SF 10
TOKENISM: completely off the scale, which means it should have just been a logarithmic scale in the first place

Hobbies: extreme sports (such as, in their environment, hopscotch)

Favourite Colour: 100 petahertz

Motto: [see appendix]

Affiliated With: accidentally granted Pantellurian Fraternity membership due to a mix‐up over string‐theory trouser diagrams

Not To Be Confused With: the Enigmoids, who can leave home without exploding

See Also: the much more moderately extreme Macropygmoids